In a conversation with a friend not long ago the comment was made "we have a lifestyle to maintain"...which got me thinking. Don't we all have a "lifestyle to maintain"? We all have different ideas about what is a great life, what things we will and won't put up with in our lives, what we're willing to wait for, what we're okay with doing, what we want, what we dream about, etc, etc, etc.
As most people know I recently quit my job to be a stay at home mum, I left the corporate working world behind on the 7th of May, 2010. My last day was full of excitment and nerves, was I cut out for this SAHM title, would I miss working, was I giving up all the hard work I'd done in college as an undergrad and now as a grad student to do nothing but be home with my kids (now before you get offended and stop reading...give me a minute to counter that statement :P), was I making the biggest mistake in this economy to give up a good job, my mind went round and round.
The next few weeks were such a whirlwind, Blake was born exactly a week after and two weeks after that we packed the last of our bags and moved to our new home in Alabama. I didn't have time to breathe much less think about what I was getting myself into.
Was I giving up our lifestyle?
Maintaining a family of 4 on one income isn't easy, admittedly we are on WIC for a couple of months to help with groceries, the kids are on the Alabama state kids plan, we cut coupons, don't eat out much and use miles or generous parents for travelling. I budget, budget and budget, there isn't any wiggle room. We don't have the option to just spend, I haven't gone on a shopping spree in months and the new shoes I want will have to wait...
Am I a crap person for giving up a great job to take care of my kids and have to lean on the state for a little assistance...
THEN I stopped beating myself up and answered the question nope, not in the slightest am I giving up our lifestyle or changing my dreams...and really I've paid into the system for years, in fact my husband still does we're utlizing the system for the reason it's there...to help us out from a slump. I *could* find a job again but between two kids in daycare and the rest of the costs associated with working outside the home (work wardrobe, gas, lunch out, etc) it wouldn't be worth it and to be honest I don't want to and I don't need too.
I'm home with my kids, everyday and I LOVE MY LIFE...I do, more than I ever have, I finally feel happy and while I have stress really it's no big deal anymore, it rolls off my back with a laugh or a giggle from my kids. We have so much going on, dance classes, MOPS, library, Awana, Church, homeschooling, we make the most of this life we've been given and the monetary side of things is irrelevant at this point. The memories I make right now are just that, mine, my kids don't know the difference between the high brand stuff and the consignment items, a trip to the lake in the backyard versus a trip to the beach resort, etc.
Staying home isn't easy, we have our ups and downs, our goods and bads...my hair may turn grey a little sooner than planned and the wine bottle opener gets good use...but this is the lifestyle I want to maintain.
Once I finish my masters and my hubby gets higher up in his company we'll be planning our trips to Europe and Australia and buying the more expensive brands just cause, I'll take K on shopping sprees and splurge for the better sports gear for B...
The lifestyle we maintain is one of love and happiness and pure enjoyment in being together as a family, sure the monetary things will adjust in time in comparison to the pocket book but the rest will always be the same.
my life, my rules...and really who couldn't smile when this is what you come home to...
and besides this kid will smile at silly Mum any day of the week
